For me, this year I will be turning 40 (ugh!) I know I tell the kids and anyone who asks I am 25, but in reality I will be turning 40. How in the world did I ever get so old? It seems like just yesterday I was a kid and now I am raising my own children.
2014 I will be honest I just kind of tuned out to the world of food and healing naturally. I lost my passion. I lost the fire. I lost a pretty big part of me in multiple ways. food being one of them. I just could not get into school because it was forcing me to look at something I was just not ready to. Something that has always played a huge part in my life - natural healing. I had also lost my passion for working out as well, something that I used to hold so dear and love. Yeah life threw me (& my family some major curve balls) and we got dealt some crappy hands. Though there has been a lot of good in there too sometimes it is hard to stay focused on that when it is feels like your life is spiraling downward.
I can tell you though that not taking care of yourself and not eating right is not going to help matters any. In fact it probably will only make things worse since if you are not fueling you body right you are not going to think as clear as you would nor feel as good about yourself or life in general.
So that is then, and though some aspects of my life are still not great - like dealing with my ex husband. Things with him are NEVER going to be good because he has control issues and also is so self absorbed he can not see past the nose on his face. He has so much hate and anger and his real issue with the kids is only to want to shove his religion down their throat and really no other purpose, oh and using them to try to hurt me. It has been 7 years since we divorced and he still is just as ugly if not MORE than while we were married and when we first got divorced. Despite the fact that he keeps taking me back to court, thinks he should have all the privileges and not any responsibility, has not paid a dime in months.... well I can't waste my life or my kids precious lives constantly stressing out about what he is or is not doing. He can fail as a parent and the kids will one day be grown and have nothing to do with him and that will be the consequence of his own actions.
This year is going to be bringing more court battles for me with him. I could choose to just keep going down the winding slope downward or we can try to choose the upward path despite those and other stresses currently going on.
So for 2015 what goals do I have
I am going to finish my schooling. I have been working on it consistently now, despite the fact that it has proven really challenging at time.
juicing daily again. at least one glass of green juice. Though I would like to be consistent and do on green juice and one carrot juice. I have been doing pretty good for the last few weeks with getting in one or the other. as a result, I have been feeling much more alive and starting to feel more connected with myself once again. Also cravings for bad foods are starting to go away. The not so great foods I had been craving consistently just haven't been sounding as good to me. I have been craving more fresh juice though.
raw food day one day per week. Yes I used to be 100% raw. I felt the best when I was doing that and also juicing but need to think of what I can realistically do here. I know I can commit to one time per week of being 100% raw again and going to start there. Maybe I will once again feel inspired as the kitchen becomes alive and a source of joy again. When my kids developed all their food sensitivities and nuts &seeds were ripped out of our life that part of me died. Well theyare able to eat them again now so we will start small. Besides honestly I have lost a lot of the joy I used to once experience in the kitchen so it will be good to work back into it.
exercise at least 4 days per week and getting the dogs out and kids out in nature at least 2 times a week. I have been pretty good about consistently going 2-3 days per week to the gym, and getting the dogs out a couple of times per week. I really want get to where I am more muscular and slimmed down again and where I just feel better about myself and my own body in general.
Meditating daily. Even if it is just for a few minutes.
The things about all this stuff is that it puts you more in tune with your inner self/being. Sometimes that not always so fun to deal with. especially if you have gotten into some habits or into a place that is not always pleasant.
I want to hit 40 feeling and looking good and ready to embark on new adventures!